A thoughtful - and passionate - article. I loved it.
I come from a different tradition to Christianity, but I'd like to address this.
In the Gospel of St Thomas, Jesus says, "“I am the light that is over all. I am the All. The All came forth out of me. And to me the All has come. Split a piece of wood — I am there. Lift the stone, and you will find me there.”
Seeing God as some bearded gent in the sky is missing the point. Plotinus gave Christianity the Trinity, and his Three Primary Hypostases have none of this. There is the ineffable One, there is the Nous or Intellect, and there is the Soul, marked, "You are Here".
You want to find what God wants, don't go guessing what something ineffable has mapped out; by definition it cannot be known or understood.
Search within. The divine is everywhere. Under a rock, inside the wood, inside your head.
All you need do is look, and listen. Don't think about it, and don't listen to the chatter of the mind. Fall still, and reflect. The answer will come, and when it does, you know for sure, because it resonates, it clicks into place, it is right.