Anal-retentive? So that's where the term "computer analyst" comes from.

I was in a cafe in some forren country once, and I looked through the drinks menu. "Eww," I said to the waiter. "What's this one? What is a 'coliche' in English, do you know?"

I pointed to an item marked 'Analcoliche'.

He looked back at me without blinking. "Oh, I do not think you would like it. It means there is no alcohol in it, lady."

Another time, when I was an uptight teenager, I went to some computing trade fair. I wanted a new computer and there was always the chance of a special deal at these places. I went from stand to stand, and began to pick out the various different people. The ones in suits were salesmen, the skinny ones with glasses were nerds, and the tubby guys with beards and t-shirts…

"Hey, you're a computer programmer, aren't you?"

They'd always be pleased that their godlike abilities had been recognised by a teenage girl, and they'd smile, and chat, and tell me the sort of computer I should buy if I wanted to be like them.

The person I was with asked me how I knew they were programmers.

"Easy," I said, wrinkling my nose.

Britni

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