Some of my acquaintances have metal decorations artfully placed in their best bits. If I'm aware of these things, I make sure I go through the security check before they do. That way I can wait in the lounge for them and have a drink ready to sooth their jangling nerves.

As for undies, the bane of my travelling existence. I have underwear from all over the world, mainly because I so often leave a few pairs draped over the shower rail and don't remember until I'm in the taxi on the way to the airport.

And don't even think about buying clothing items in Asia where women tend to be constructed along more petite lines. Spending ten hours wriggling in my seat because I've inadvertently bought the wrong size is not something that can be overcome to more than a certain degree with glasses of bubbly.


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